lunch
Side note: do people know where gringo comes from? It is a word created during the Mexican-American war of the mid-19th century, when American forces wore green uniforms, and Mexicans chanted "green, go", as in, get out of our country. So when people here say "Let me present my gringo friend," it is a bit of an awkward situation, as I feel like laughing at the term.
Speaking of laughing: I haven't exercised in weeks (months really), but I laugh just about enough to consider it a work out. People around here - namely Amalita the host Mom - thinks it is so funny that I laugh/smile at every little thing. Mostly it is for joy/I find something funny/the normal causes of laughter, but quite often it is because I am desperately uncomfortable, or nervous. The good old awkward giggle. Last night I couldn't stop!
So at 6:00PM at the office last night, we all gathered to celebrate the October birthdays of staff members (including me). The celebration featured patacons - hard shell tortilla-like platano thing - with beef and chicken. And some cola. Nothing like a nice beef pie for the birthday celebration. They sang happy birthday, and then every single member of the staff came and congratulated each of us (3 ladies including me) and gave us kisses. It was a bit awkward, as there was a coffee table in the way and about 10 people in the sitting area made for around 4. Kisses kisses kisses.
I went home feeling a bit down, homesick, nostalgic. I laid down and decided to mope for the night, but Amalita had different plans. She came in and invited me to a halloween party that Armando's (host Dad) company was having. Armando is an agricultural engineer, he works for a company that grows rice, and he has a former intern/apprentice that Amalia and he have been scheming to introduce me to. I said no at first, but Amalia knew I was feeling down, and she convinced me that it was better to go out and meet people (namely this Nelson former-apprentice bloke) than sit in my bed moping. So I reluctantly agreed.
Oy. We arrived and I realized (how had it escaped me before?) that the party was a dance party. Nothing in Colombia is anything without rumba. So I was introduced around and then sat in the circle of chairs facing the dance floor, observing the flow of Latin rhythm that I so desperately want to learn, though am too embarrassed to start.
With my entrance came the drunken attempts to speak English, which I must say, is a pretty hilarious potential SNL skit. "What is name" with a strong, nearly unintelligible accent. I tell them my name, and repeat it about 20 times to perfect their pronunciation (though, why bother, they are an entire liter of whiskey deep, and 5 minutes later they ask me again what my name is. One man, with what appeared to be an epiphany, cried "Oh! Like llaves (keys)? Keys is your name?" No, sir, hate to burst the bubble, but it isn't like keys really.
In walks a tall, handsome, built Colombian man, and he is the former apprentice of Armando, Nelson. Woah. Model? He is a Caribbean champion water polo player, and plays on Colombia's olympic team. So maybe coming to the party was a good idea? Unfortunately, he can't tear his attention away from the 22 year old apprentice that Armando has replaced him with, a blond, voluptuous Colombiana with rumba fever. Oh well. Instead I am chatted up by the following: the sweet, Colombian, Fedarroz halloween party equivalent of Ross from Friends; a very drunk older man who sways when he is standing up and who refuses to take no for an answer when he asks me to dance; a kind older man who studied in Italy and so thinks he can speak English (?); a very sweet young guy, also ex-apprentice of Armando, who I have plans to play tennis with tomorrow; and finally a man dressed as a mime, who proceeds to do a 30 minute mime act asking me to dance - he takes no for an answer even less than the old drunk guy - very awkward.
Armando (the boss) proceeded to arrange a Halloween contest - individuals or groups of two would improvise an act based on a random song that they got assigned, and the winner got a few thousand pesos ($1 = 1,800 pesos). I was elected as one of the judges. Not my choice... It was mostly uncomfortable, but tons of laughter and I think everyone had a rather splendid evening. The mime & Colombian-Ross acted out a silent skit relating to unhygienic baking practices and the gasto-intestinal consequences. It was mostly gross, but they won anyway.
The ultimate icing on the cake last night was Carlitos, the drunk swayer, when he performed, he mostly just stood up and slurred speech in front of us all, but he was wearing those funny glasses that have the glasses and the nose, but instead of a nose there was a certain male reproductive organ. VERY awkward/gross/uncomfortable/hilarious.
breakfast
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