Phase 1 Graduation & SELF-DOUBT

I guess I began this blog setting a rather difficult precedent to keep up with. In the beginning I wrote and wrote and wrote about anything and everything, but the last few weeks & months there hasn't really been all that much to report. I work, I try to work on my thesis, I go home & surf the interweb for hours, and then I fall asleep. Sounds rather tedious when I write it out like that.

Yesterday was my first day seeing the youth participants since before the holidays. We had a "graduation" ceremony for the first phase of the program, which really doesn't count for anything... the kids still have 2 more active phases to go before they are officially A Ganar graduates, but the institution that we "subcontracted" to implement Phase 1 (which really just means that they are certified as a training institute, because we still did the hiring, training, and implementation ourselves) wanted to have a ceremony for the kids with their families and all of that jazz.

I have recently begun the process of preparing myself mentally for a job search. This internship is only 7 weeks away from the end, and my employment status looms above, a dark rain cloud that induces stress and sometimes even panic. I have done a few very brief job searches, nothing too intensive, but the results have been worrisome. Unpaid volunteer positions & executive director positions, and not much in between. But the other thing that begins to worry is that I don't really know what I want. I am clear that I dislike mindless, tedious work. But the idea of having a lot of responsibility stresses me out. Isn't there a bed that feels just right? (Goldie Locks)